This post brought to you by the letter G*

Last night, Stinkerton and I were watching Saturday Night Live when all of a sudden the TV was asking us, "What is G?" Our first response was, "What is this?" then, "Is this a joke? It has to be a joke. It's some sort of SNL spoof." A black and white screen, various athletes who slightly moved their heads, a guy with a gruff voice mumbling something about "G" being the emblem of a warrior. How could this possibly be serious? Then, Tiger Woods' face appeared and we knew that it was a real commercial. We instantly had two questions:

1) What the hell is "G?" At first we thought, maybe it's yet another extreme fragrance commercial. We'd have to do some research to figure out what this stuff was.

2) What won't Tiger Woods advertize?

After some googling, we discovered that "G" stands for Gatorade. Really, Gatorade? I'm not sure how I feel about Gatorade trying to push itself up to some sort of divine level. Sure, it helps to replace electrolytes after you've been exercising, but is it really what makes the "swagger of an athlete?" Is it really "a lower case god?" I don't think so. It's a sports drink, that's it. And talk about great advertizing. No one knows what "G" is supposed to be. The commercial doesn't show the beverage at all or even have the word "Gatorade" subtly mentioned anywhere. We're supposed to either just know or take a really good guess. Google results show that a whole lot of other people don't know what "G" is either. Do you know how difficult it is to google a letter? I got results for G-Unit, G-Flex, G-Shock, and eventually came across the answer. Ridiculous!

Do you remember when Tiger Woods was still likeable? He shocked the world by being part African American, part Chinese, part Thai, part Native American, part Dutch, and by having the name Tiger. At a time when golf was just something that boring white people did (and kinda steeped with racism), Woods appeared and really swung some life back into the game. People, even mini-golfers like myself, started paying attention (albeit just for a little bit) as the next greatest golf sensation since the invention of the Arnie Palmer took our breath away (okay, maybe no one paid that much attention).

But now, I wonder if he even plays all that much golf. He has become the posterboy for almost every product ever. How could I tell that the "What is G?" commercial was real? Because Tiger Woods was in it. I'm really starting to wonder if there is anything that he will not accept money for to advertize. So far he's showed up in commercials for:

1) Nike
2) Gillete
3) Gatorade
4) Tag Heur
5) Accenture
6) Buick/GM
7) Titleist
8) American Express
9) General Mills

Nine major advertizement deals. At this point I'm not sure whether there is an actual product in the commercial or if I'm supposed to be paying for Tiger Woods' face. Tiger, don't you have enough money? You seem like a nice guy, or at least your highly marketed smile seems to imply that you are, so how about you get back to the game? Maybe we can all remember you by some new cocktail, rather than as a guy who'll do just about anything for money.

*And in some parts by Stinkerton