Tuesday night marked the beginning of yet another installment in Fox's, reality TV sensation, American Idol. Once every year, this juggernaut casts its shadow on Tuesday and Wednesday night television. Spilling into the morning show on every radio and network TV station, this program forms a black hole of gossip that you can't escape. Even if you turn off your cell-phone, put on your tin-foil helmet and ignore all electronic devices, your normally reclusive People-reading office-mate storms into your cubical to tell you how David Archuleta, "just isn't that cute."
I usually cannot bring myself to watch this Seacrest-ation, Lets do some math, each week, each contestant is asked to sing a 1:30 song clip. So, even in the first week, that is 1.5× 12 minutes = 2 hours over two nights.
However, I enjoy making fun of people more than most, so since there is nothing better on prime-time TV, I somehow convinced myself it was okay to watch the auditions. In case you are one of those Amish people who is on leave, these COMPLETE idiots come from all over the land to embarrass themselves in front of... four judges? four? Am I seeing double? Are there two Paulas? No, can't be, she looks sober: She has the presence of mind to realize that it would be good for ratings to get in a cat fight with the bikini-clad Missoran. Some more math:
Crazy Chicks × 2 + drunk chick = ratings!
Who is this Kara DioGuardi (it's not delivery)? After a half-assed Google Search, all I can tell is that her only claim to fame is that she is hot, nicer than Simon, and that she is the former roommate of Paula. Can this girl really be Simon's replacement? Simon brings intelligent, insightful, well formulated observations to the show, and this girl holds Paula's hair back...
At least there is a silver lining, we don't have to deal with that doe-eyed, dread-locked d-bag Jason Castro in this season.... NOOOO!
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