Tuesday, December 22, 2009

The Worst 9 of '09 (and late '08)

I'm baaaaaaaack! Yet again! No guarantees that I'll stick around, but here's a long rambling post for ya to get things going again (maybe).

I hadn't really been feeling particularly inspired to rage about anything in particular until the holiday season reared its ugly head once again (as early as the first week of September in my neighborhood), thus forcing me to notice that not much has changed over the past year. Many of things that angered me towards the end of last year and the first half of this year are still around, and perhaps worse than ever!

So without further ado, here they are!

9) The perfume ads have returned! Many, if not most, of the ads from last year are taking up almost all airspace yet again. Some scents (such as Pink from Lacoste) are slightly different-still just as annoying but now with a new song and new girl running about. I didn't think it was possible, but I think there might be more this year than there were last year.

8) P. Diddy or whatever you call him is still around and still bothering people. His I Am King advert still pops up on TV and he is still a douche. His wax figure was recently unveiled at Madame Tussaud's and guess what? He gave MT a bottle of I Am King so that his figure could be as accurate a representation of him as possible. Douche.

7) Tiger Woods is more of a whore than ever. Back in January I ranted about how Tiger Woods will do anything, and I mean anything, for money. The man, as far as I could count, had 9 major advertizement deals. Well, it turns out that he ain't just a whore for money. The guy likes his women, and lots of them (at least 9-what is it with the number 9 this year). It looks like he won't have as many advertizing deals going into 2010.

6) The Liskula Cohen skank ordeal just won't die. Remember Cohen? The former, failed model who sued Google over a blog entitled "Skanks in NYC?" Well, it turns out that Cohen won the case and the blogger had to reveal her identity. I'm not sure which part of the story is more sad, the fact that someone as obnoxious as Cohen could actually get away with suing Google or that the previously anonymous blogger did not turn out (as I'd predicted) to be an awkward 16 year old but one of Cohen's prior acquaintances. Lame.

5) Yo Yo Ma is still too happy. I was a little unsettled by his never ending smile when he played in a suit at Obama's inauguration (it was freakin' cold outside) and wondered if he could ever frown. Don't think so. I saw him play at the Royal Albert Hall a couple months ago and he is possibly the happiest person ever to live. Okay, I'll admit it, I love you Yo Yo Ma!

4) Actors who want you to think they have standards but don't. Last time it was Pierce Brosnan and George Clooney. This time it's Patrick Dempsey (McDreamy) and Matthew Fox (Jack from Lost) getting all gelled up for L'Oreal. Proof:


This second one might be allowed because Fox is, well, a fox.

3) PETA still sucks. Aretha Franklin, on the other hand, gets her own and dresses all out in fur. Way to go lady.

2) Sarah Palin still won't shut up. Just give her a freakin' reality show already. No one takes her seriously, and if they do, well, there's just no hope for them.

1) I still find myself feeling like Mugatu. Not because of U2 this time (although that never really goes away) but because of Muse. Granted, I do kind of like them (I can't help it!), but I really don't get the obsession everyone has with them. Every single one of their songs sounds the same. I have a really hard time telling the songs apart on their albums and was a bit confused when their "new" album came out a couple months ago. This is new? It sounds like more of the same.

That's all for now!