The Worst 9 of '09 (and late '08)

I'm baaaaaaaack! Yet again! No guarantees that I'll stick around, but here's a long rambling post for ya to get things going again (maybe).

I hadn't really been feeling particularly inspired to rage about anything in particular until the holiday season reared its ugly head once again (as early as the first week of September in my neighborhood), thus forcing me to notice that not much has changed over the past year. Many of things that angered me towards the end of last year and the first half of this year are still around, and perhaps worse than ever!

So without further ado, here they are!

9) The perfume ads have returned! Many, if not most, of the ads from last year are taking up almost all airspace yet again. Some scents (such as Pink from Lacoste) are slightly different-still just as annoying but now with a new song and new girl running about. I didn't think it was possible, but I think there might be more this year than there were last year.

8) P. Diddy or whatever you call him is still around and still bothering people. His I Am King advert still pops up on TV and he is still a douche. His wax figure was recently unveiled at Madame Tussaud's and guess what? He gave MT a bottle of I Am King so that his figure could be as accurate a representation of him as possible. Douche.

7) Tiger Woods is more of a whore than ever. Back in January I ranted about how Tiger Woods will do anything, and I mean anything, for money. The man, as far as I could count, had 9 major advertizement deals. Well, it turns out that he ain't just a whore for money. The guy likes his women, and lots of them (at least 9-what is it with the number 9 this year). It looks like he won't have as many advertizing deals going into 2010.

6) The Liskula Cohen skank ordeal just won't die. Remember Cohen? The former, failed model who sued Google over a blog entitled "Skanks in NYC?" Well, it turns out that Cohen won the case and the blogger had to reveal her identity. I'm not sure which part of the story is more sad, the fact that someone as obnoxious as Cohen could actually get away with suing Google or that the previously anonymous blogger did not turn out (as I'd predicted) to be an awkward 16 year old but one of Cohen's prior acquaintances. Lame.

5) Yo Yo Ma is still too happy. I was a little unsettled by his never ending smile when he played in a suit at Obama's inauguration (it was freakin' cold outside) and wondered if he could ever frown. Don't think so. I saw him play at the Royal Albert Hall a couple months ago and he is possibly the happiest person ever to live. Okay, I'll admit it, I love you Yo Yo Ma!

4) Actors who want you to think they have standards but don't. Last time it was Pierce Brosnan and George Clooney. This time it's Patrick Dempsey (McDreamy) and Matthew Fox (Jack from Lost) getting all gelled up for L'Oreal. Proof:



annnd:



This second one might be allowed because Fox is, well, a fox.

3) PETA still sucks. Aretha Franklin, on the other hand, gets her own and dresses all out in fur. Way to go lady.

2) Sarah Palin still won't shut up. Just give her a freakin' reality show already. No one takes her seriously, and if they do, well, there's just no hope for them.

1) I still find myself feeling like Mugatu. Not because of U2 this time (although that never really goes away) but because of Muse. Granted, I do kind of like them (I can't help it!), but I really don't get the obsession everyone has with them. Every single one of their songs sounds the same. I have a really hard time telling the songs apart on their albums and was a bit confused when their "new" album came out a couple months ago. This is new? It sounds like more of the same.

That's all for now!

PETA=a bunch of America hating terrorist pansies

I am going to do my best to put aside my disdain for vegetarianism and veganism for at least most of this post (If I have kids in the future, I would be mortified and possibly disown them if they attempted to become a vegetarian or vegan before turning 18). It'll be tough, but I'll do what I can. 

The title of this post probably has you going, "What? Terrorists? America hating? Pansies to be sure, but isn't calling them a bunch of terrorists going a bit too far?"

I say absolutely not. Let's cover the pansies aspect first. A Best Week Ever post brought me over to PETA's website and a video of their banned Super Bowl commercial. In the commercial, almost naked women dance around being seduced by asparagus and pumpkins. The message is "Vegetarians have better sex." After my eyes had fallen out due to the horror (don't worry, I put them back in again), I continued to watch their remaining video with reasons why to convert to vegetarianism. The video is pretty awful. Crappy music, dramatic "acting," and people smiling while animals are being slaughtered in the background. Here are a few:

#3: Because eating meat and dairy makes you fat. 

Hmmm....because eating crappy vegetables at a salad bar and lettuce with bread makes you really skinny. Not all vegetarians cook healthy food so this is kind of a ridiculous statement.

#4: Because you shouldn't have to lie to your kids about the food that you eat.

Why not? Parents make stuff up all the time! You can lie to your kids about Santa and tell them babies come from storks but you have to tell them where hamburgers come from? When the kids get older, they'll figure it out, will have a moment of "I can't believe you've let me eat this!" then remember how good it tastes and get over it.

#5: Because in every single package of chicken (which they repeat a couple of times) there's a little bit of poop.

PANSIES!!! Seriously, how unprofessional does this sound? So what? Do you see the poop when you're cooking? Do you taste the poop? Have you died yet from eating it? Don't you rinse off your chicken before cooking it? You do cook your food right? We supposedly swallow spiders in our sleep. We can't avoid gross things no matter what we do so we might as well suck it up and deal.

#6: Because meat is filthy and bloody.

Um, again, don't you cook your food? I personally like my red meat on the rare side. Bloody to me means more flavor. 

#12: Because no one should have to make a living from killing.

People have been killing animals forever. I don't really understand why all of a sudden it's considered "violence." Is it "violence" when my old cat killed a squirrel? The only difference between humans killing animals for food and animals killing animals for food is that humans think about it way too much. 

And now on to the America hating terrorist part. Think about it, what do terrorists do? They use aggressive (and almost always underhanded) tactics to scare people out of doing something. Their targets don't stop believing in something or doing something because they've suddenly been convinced that their ideology was wrong all along. Instead, they stop because they're scared that something bad will happen to them if they openly profess what they believe in. How does this actually help your cause? Sure it gets attention, but ultimately, those who force their beliefs upon others will not be remembered kindly in the history books. 

PETA also targets "fur offenders," or prominent celebs who continue to wear fur despite the fact that it's now considered offensive to do so. Instead of making people feel bad by going on about how wearing fur is a complete luxury in this day and age and no longer a necessity, they pour paint or whatever else on them in public. The expensive coat is ruined and the animals have now died for no reason. PETA defaced Sharon Stone, the Olsen twins, and Aretha Franklin's Hollywood stars with the words "fur hag." Okay, so some graffiti is not as bad as putting a bomb in a trash can, but the mentalities behind them are similar. How are people supposed to gain respect for the cause when PETA takes such despicable actions? 

Have they ever done any research beyond what goes on in the slaughterhouses? Do you know what brought the British and French over to the US and Canada? In part it was the fur trade. People built various fur trading posts, helping to create trade routes. Fur was a method of bringing different nationalities together, as well as Europeans and Native Americans. It wasn't all good, but it wasn't all bad either. It started out of necessity and then became more of a fashion statement. How can you condemn Aretha Franklin for wanting to wear fur? Of course we shouldn't go around making fur coats from white tiger fur or other endangered animals, but I find it hard to get all bent out of shape because someone is wearing a mink coat (mink are typically farmed for fur). And what's the problem with leather? I love my leather jacket. It looks good, it feels good, and it's lasted a long time. Not to mention that it keeps the wind off better than any of my synthetic material jackets. I took textile chemistry in college and know that synthetic material doesn't necessarily mean better for the environment. In some cases, especially with more recent developments in synthetic materials and manufacturing methods, synthetics are better, but certainly not in all. My issue with fur is that it's really not practical in most parts of the world these days. London certainly doesn't get cold enough for a full-out fur coat and a lot of the time, they kind of look ridiculous. However, some fur coats are gorgeous and I don't think I'd say no if someone gave me one. 

I could go on and on about how much PETA aggravates me, but I think I've said enough for one day.